Me & Joan (of Arc) Page 9

vision of what really happened in her childhood)

  Lili: But it wasn't me! A woman was spread on the carpet. He was on top of her.

  Tomas: (Climaxing) Yes!

  Lili: (Joyful) But it wasn't me. Oh, God, it wasn't me!

  (As Lili cries out, embracing Tomas, the Fathers put hands on Joan)

  Joan: (Startled) Father!

  (Hearing Joan call him, Tomas is in that instant aware of what he's done, that he's had sex, and crumbles– )

  Tomas: (Shock, despair) Nooo!

  Lili: (Happily) Joan. (Rising) I know why I left you! Joan...?

  (Joan is being lifted by the Fathers, who resemble a many-headed hydra being squeezed out of a toothpaste tube)

  Fathers: (Turn their “heads” toward Tomas) Tomas! Help us.

  Tomas: (Gasping, broken) Fathers...Please...I need to talk.

  Father: Come along, Tomas.

  Tomas: I've sinned. There's something wrong with me.

  Fathers: (Busying themselves with Joan) We've all sinned, my son.

  Tomas: Help me, Fathers.

  Fathers: We must attend to the woman...her examination. Virgin, she calls herself.

  (Joan is being examined to determine whether she is still a virgin or not. The Fathers buzz and clutch, Tomas manages to ask his questions, and they respond, but whenever Joan moans, they stop their litany to peer pruriently her. The Fathers will be most powerful, when they are most reasonable)

  Fathers: We'll find out, we'll find out.

  Tomas: Fathers, I've done a terrible thing.

  Felipe: You're troubled, my son?

  (The tight pack stretches to buzz and bob around him like so many chickens at a feeding trough)

  Tomas: I can't be a priest any more.

  Felipe: Nonsense. (To the other Fathers) How does he look? Any signs?

  Fathers: Weakness? Lost appetite? Hunger? Vomiting?

  Tomas: (Turning about to watch them) Signs?

  Fathers: (Bobbing and nodding to themselves) Hoarseness? Paralysis? Random ejaculations? Face pimples?

  Tomas: I don't... What...

  (Joan moans)

  Fathers: (Craning to observe Joan as they drone on) Loss of memory? Cramps? Hysteria? Epilepsy?

  Tomas: Signs of what?!

  (Father Felipe puts his hand on Tomas, comfortingly, sympathetic, fatherly)

  Felipe: Of masturbation.

  Tomas: What? No!

  Felipe: Of course not. Tomas is a fine young priest.

  Tomas: It has to do with...a woman.

  Felipe: Aaah, yes.

  Father Inferior: Danger has a female face. Avoid playing or joking with women.

  Lili: (Quietly from a distance, beginning to move to Tomas) Don't be afraid.

  Father Inferior: Consider: the most lovely girl begins as a foul-smelling drop of semen – and becomes, when grown, a container for filth.

  Tomas: But when a woman comes to confess...

  Felipe: You know the forms, Tomas. You must ask how she has sinned. Whether with impure words, or thoughts, or glances, or touches.

  Father Inferior: She may not have sex before or after prayer, or on a day she wants communion, or a feast day, or a procession day, or a Sunday, or before baptism, or during Lent, or whenever she's pregnant, or for 30 days after her wedding, or not at all if she's old.

  Tomas: But when is a woman free from sin?

  Father Inferior: (A new idea) Perhaps...if the husband does not ejaculate at all, and holds his semen in...?

  Felipe: There's no way to police that.

  Father Superior: There still would be too much pleasure.

  Father Inferior: We might allow occasional ejaculations, provided they aren't intentional.

  Tomas: (Amazed) How do you think of these things?!

  (Joan cries out on the examination table, and the Fathers turn to her. Lili is now close to Tomas)

  Lili: I'm sorry. I used you.

  Tomas: But I wanted you to.

  Lili: It was unkind of me.

  Tomas: You were afraid.

  Lili: For Joan, yes. But then you gave me...

  Tomas: What.

  Lili: Don't you know?

  Tomas: I attacked you!

  Lili: No, Tomas. It wasn't like that.

  Tomas: But I...(He stops, choked)

  Lili: You gave me truth. (Beat) Are you sorry?

  (Tomas looks at her slowly, moved)

  Tomas: I want to marry!

  (The Fathers hearing the word “marry” whirl back, as a group, alarmed)

  Fathers: No!!

  Father Inferior: Marriage is death!

  Father Superior: Sex passes sin to the child.

  Tomas: Christ blessed marriage!

  Fathers: (Rolling eyes--oldest joke they know) Uuuhhh.

  Father Superior: Only as a virgin have you hope.

  Tomas: You're saying women themselves are evil?

  Father Inferior: The purpose of women is sex, and sex is primal evil.

  Tomas: What?

  Father Superior: What other purpose does she have, but to bear children.

  Felipe: Fathers, fathers, you're being too harsh with the boy. (Very kindly) Listen Tomas...the energy in semen attempts to produce a creature equally perfect, that is, another man. But...under unfavorable circumstances...women come into existence. A woman, basically, is a mutilated, or imperfect, male.

  Tomas: But Jesus loves them equally!

  Felipe: He cares for them as for children or invalids, creatures not wholly formed.

  Tomas: How can I counsel women, when I know nothing of their pain. I feel it, but have no understanding.

  Felipe: Dear boy, we must tend women, but also, fear closeness, guard against it, to preserve our souls.

  Tomas: But my heart melts for women. Jesus was tender with them.

  Felipe: And Jesus was the son of God! Tomas, take care of your soul!

  Tomas: He found them gentle, more holy than men.

  Felipe: The devil creeps in by gentle paths. A woman's eye can touch your soul, not only the eye of a whore, but of a saint as well. This one, here, on the table, this Joan, who fancies herself in love with God, may have been whore to the devil.

  Tomas: No!! You're insane. You're insane!!

  Joan: (A cry of pain) Ahhhhhh!

  (The examination is complete. The Fathers turn abruptly toward the table)

  Father Superior: (Announcing the results) She is a virgin.

  (Tomas and Lili cling to each other. The Fathers must release Joan and back off, and she rolls free, standing pure and strong in a center they cannot invade, though they immediately build toward another charge– )

  Fathers: (Repeating as a chant that builds) She is not a whole woman. That is, sexually mature, that is, of this earth...that is, subject to man!

  (The Fathers descend on Joan with the accusations from the trial, as Tomas and Lili watch, horrified. Joan answers bravely, clearly at first, but their rage of sound becomes overwhelming, and they hedge her from every direction)

  Father Superior: They say you're against god.

  Joan: What?

  Father Inferior: Against god

  Joan: Of course not. How could I be?

  Father Superior: Do you accept the authority of the God's church?

  Joan: I'm a daughter of the church.

  Felipe: You must leave these blasphemous clothes.

  Joan: I may not, until God says.

  Father Inferior: You claim God speaks to you alone?

  Joan: No. My voices tell me what he wants.

  Father Superior: Who are these voices?

  Felipe: What do they say?

  Joan: I'm not sure I may tell you.

  Father Inferior: What? Not sure?

  Joan: I'll have to ask permission.

  Father Superior: Your voices are not from God.

  Joan: They ar
e from God.

  Felipe: The voices are your imagination.

  Joan: That's how God speaks to us!

  (Surprised, the Fathers are thrown back from their drive, like drawing an unexpected breath, before launching against her with redoubled energy– )

  Fathers: We are the voice of God on earth!

  Father Superior: Your voices are from the devil.

  Joan: No...

  Father Inferior: Your voices are from the devil.

  Joan: No.

  Felipe: You dance with fairies?

  Joan: No!

  Father Superior: You are a witch!!

  (Everything stops dead silent)

  Joan: (Pause, timidly) A...what?

  Lili: (Hushed) Oh my god.

  Father Inferior: (Doom voice) A witch.

  Tomas: (Stepping toward Joan, Lili close behind) Dear innocent child...it means a woman...

  Fathers: (Hissed) A witch.

  Tomas: ...who has power...

  Joan: But that doesn't mean...

  Tomas: ...and therefore...

  Fathers: (Hissed) A witch.

  Tomas: ...must be made…dead.

  Lili: (Frightened) No...

  Fathers: (Energetically attacking) Your voices are from the devil.

  Joan: No! They're blessed Saint Margaret and Catherine.

  Felipe: (Soft) Of course, they appear holy to you, child. How do they look?

  Joan: Beautiful!. Like queens on earth.

  Felipe: Poor child. They deceived you.

  Father Inferior: Your help is the devil.

  Joan: No!

  Lili: She's God's general!

  Father Superior: You jumped from the tower. You fell sixty feet. How did you live?

  Joan: I...don't know.

  Lili: We've got to help her, Tomas!

  Tomas: (Holding Lili) I don't know how!

  (The Fathers continue their attack with rising frenzy)

  Felipe: Did your voices tell you to jump?

  Father Inferior: Did you plan to fly?

  Joan: I tried to escape

  Father Superior: The devil saved you!

  Joan: My voices saved me. But they were angry with me.

  Felipe: (Putting a hand on her shoulder) They've deceived you, Joan

  Father Superior: (Putting a hand on her head) Return to the arms of the church.

  Father Inferior: (Hand cradling her chin and cheek) Have they told you you will be burned?

  Joan: (Wary) No...

  Lili: (Panicked) Get them away from her! You have to help her!

  Tomas: (Venturing toward Joan) Yes, I'll...

  (But Fathers race on, Tomas has no way in)

  Felipe: Have they told you you will be burned?

  Joan: No!

  Fathers: Have they told you you will be burned?!

  Joan: No! My voices will deliver me!

  Father: How will they deliver you?

  (Felipe, seeing Tomas, calls to him)

  Felipe: Tomas – come, my boy. (Picking up Joan's dress) You can save her.

  Lili: (Alarmed, jumps forward to grab Tomas' hand) No!

  Felipe: (To Tomas) You refuse the church?

  Father Superior: That's heresy.

  Father Inferior: And heretics must burn.

  Joan: No...

  Felipe: She'll trust you. Speak to her, Tomas.

  Lili: Don't go with them. They want her dead!

  (Tomas looks at Lili, then back to Joan)

  Felipe: (Softly, hand out to Tomas) Only you can save her, Tomas. It's a human life.

  (Tomas is torn, but breathes deep, takes the dress and, moves toward Joan. Lili stands facing Tomas)

  Lili: Here's your betrayer, Joan. This man.

  (Tomas looks at Lili, and, in mute sorrow, moves past her)

  Joan: (Seeing Tomas, grateful, trusting) Oh dear Father, what can I do?

  (Tomas gazes at her, wanting to weep, but finally answers)

  Tomas: They want you to dress as a woman.

  Joan: I can't do that.

  Tomas: They want you to admit your counsel was not of God.

  Joan: Why? When it was.

  Tomas: They believe you're from the devil.

  Joan: How can they?

  Tomas: (Weeping) Because...

  Joan: Because if God's with me, he must not be with them.

  Tomas: (Angry, cries out) If God's with you, why isn't he saving you!

  Joan: (Unbowed, stubborn) I can't help if God hasn't told them his plan for me.

  Fathers: (In a repeated chant) Deny your visions. Deny your voices. Deny yourself.

  (The Fathers circle and continue, with soldiers, to surround Joan, creating a physical whirl, at the apex of which is the preparation for burning – a stake, hill of wood, the looming threat of fire)

  Lili: (Leaping towards Joan) No! You're twisting her words.

  (The vortex is spinning, with Lili in an inner circle near Joan)

  Joan: (To Lili) You'd better get away.

  Lili: What?

  Joan: Don't get caught with me. I must be evil.

  Lili: No...

  Joan: If I were right, I'd win.

  Felipe: Prepare yourself for the fire, Joan.

  Tomas: (Rising, hoarse) Save yourself. They'll